(Everyday is A Gift)

My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package. "This", he said, "is not a slip. This is lingerie." He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip.

妹夫打開了妹妹衣柜最底層抽屜，拿出一個用紙包裝的包裹。“這個，”他說，“不是件普通內衣，而是一件豪華內衣。”他把薄紙撕開，遞給了我那件內衣。

It was exquisite, silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached.

它的確精致無比，絲質、全手工縫制，周圍還有一圈網狀蕾絲花邊。價簽都尚未拆去，上面的數字高得驚人。

"Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least 8 or 9 years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion.

“這是我們第一次去紐約時簡買的，至少已是八、九年前的事了。她從沒有穿過它。她想等一個特殊的日子再穿它。”

Well, I guess this is the occasion.

唉，我想現在便是那特殊的日子了。

He took the slip from me and put it on the bed, with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician. His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment, then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me, "Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you' re alive is a special occasion."

妹夫從我手中拿過內衣放在床上，和其他我們要帶給殯儀服務人員的衣服放在一起。他的手在那柔軟織物上徘徊了一會兒，隨即砰然關上抽屜，轉身對我說：“永遠不要把任何東西留給什么特殊日子。你活著的每一天就是一個特殊的日子。”

I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane returning to California from the midwestern town where my sister's family lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special.

這兩句話久久在我耳邊回響著，伴我度過了葬禮和幫妹夫、侄女處理妹妹意外死亡后的傷心后事的那幾天。我從位處中西部的妹妹家返回加州時，在飛機上還是在想這兩句話。我想到妹妹未曾有機會看到、聽到或去做的事。我想到她淡然做過，但卻沒有意識到其特殊性的事。

I'm still thinking about his words, and they've changed the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee meetings. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experience to savour, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moment now and cherish them.